Two Dads are Better than None

Mexico

valentines days in Mexico was a blast

New Closet

Before

We had an empty room behind this wall that went to waste. There is a skylight in it too.



After
We intalled a french door, painted the walls and installed a new closet. Now we have a nice dressing room...took lots of time, but it was worth it we think.

Why The M Word Matters To Me
Only marriage can bring a gay person home
By ANDREW SULLIVAN
As a child, I had no idea what homosexuality was. I grew up in a traditional home ? Catholic, conservative, middle class. Life was relatively simple: education, work, family. I was raised to aim high in life, even though my parents hadn't gone to college. But one thing was instilled in me. What mattered was not how far you went in life, how much money you earned, how big a name you made for yourself. What really mattered was family and the love you had for one another. The most important day of your life was not graduation from college or your first day at work or a raise or even your first house. The most important day of your life was when you got married. It was on that day that all your friends and all your family got together to celebrate the most important thing in life: your happiness ? your ability to make a new home, to form a new but connected family, to find love that put everything else into perspective.

But as I grew older, I found that this was somehow not available to me. I didn't feel the things for girls that my peers did. All the emotions and social rituals and bonding of teenage heterosexual life eluded me. I didn't know why. No one explained it. My emotional bonds to other boys were one-sided; each time I felt myself falling in love, they sensed it, pushed it away. I didn't and couldn't blame them. I got along fine with my buds in a nonemotional context, but something was awry, something not right. I came to know almost instinctively that I would never be a part of my family the way my siblings might one day be. The love I had inside me was unmentionable, anathema. I remember writing in my teenage journal one day, "I'm a professional human being. But what do I do in my private life?"


I never discussed my real life. I couldn't date girls and so immersed myself in schoolwork, the debate team, school plays, anything to give me an excuse not to confront reality. When I looked toward the years ahead, I couldn't see a future. There was just a void. Was I going to be alone my whole life? Would I ever have a most important day in my life? It seemed impossible, a negation, an undoing. To be a full part of my family, I had to somehow not be me. So, like many other gay teens, I withdrew, became neurotic, depressed, at times close to suicidal. I shut myself in my room with my books night after night while my peers developed the skills needed to form real relationships and loves. In wounded pride, I even voiced a rejection of family and marriage. It was the only way I could explain my isolation.

It took years for me to realize that I was gay, years more to tell others and more time yet to form any kind of stable emotional bond with another man. Because my sexuality had emerged in solitude ? and without any link to the idea of an actual relationship ? it was hard later to reconnect sex to love and self-esteem. It still is. But I persevered, each relationship slowly growing longer than the last, learning in my 20s and 30s what my straight friends had found out in their teens. But even then my parents and friends never asked the question they would have asked automatically if I were straight: So, when are you going to get married? When will we be able to celebrate it and affirm it and support it? In fact, no one ? no one ? has yet asked me that question.

When people talk about gay marriage, they miss the point. This isn't about gay marriage. It's about marriage. It's about family. It's about love. It isn't about religion. It's about civil marriage licenses. Churches can and should have the right to say no to marriage for gays in their congregations, just as Catholics say no to divorce, but divorce is still a civil option. These family values are not options for a happy and stable life. They are necessities. Putting gay relationships in some other category ? civil unions, domestic partnerships, whatever ? may alleviate real human needs, but by their very euphemism, by their very separateness, they actually build a wall between gay people and their families. They put back the barrier many of us have spent a lifetime trying to erase.

It's too late for me to undo my past. But I want above everything else to remember a young kid out there who may even be reading this now. I want to let him know that he doesn't have to choose between himself and his family anymore. I want him to know that his love has dignity, that he does indeed have a future as a full and equal part of the human race. Only marriage will do that. Only marriage can bring him home.

Homosexuality is WRONG because the Bible says so!!

Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses
advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she
said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an
abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be
condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open
letter to Dr. Laura penned by a US resident, which was posted
on the Internet.


Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the
homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them.

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19-24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath.. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.19:27. How should they die?

I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all
the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? Lev. 20:14

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted fan, Jim

SURPRISE!

Robert & Bobby threw a surprise party for Kimberly last weekend. Robert lives in downtown Dallas and we were on the rooftop partying.
The weather was amazing. It was in the 70s and we were wearing short sleeves. Happpy Birthday Kim!





By the way, I hope everyone has a great 2004! If you'd like to say hi, just leave a comment!

Christmas 2003 Photos



Christmas at Rhonda's. We even got a present for our future niece - Brooklyn



At the Price's we opened presents Christmas morning and ate amazing food!



Hanging out with the Jeter's and me trying to ice skate



What a bunch of hams



A carriage ride Christmas eve



James got drunk and puked on my mom's fur. (Just kidding)

Our Families Meet

Christmas 2003 was the a special holiday for Greg and I. Our families finally met each other for the first time in Frederick Maryland. I stayed with Greg's mom and dad and Nick and Mistry came up from Austin too.

When Greg and I met we had no idea we had family so close together. His parents live in Fredrick and I have tons of family in Hagerstown, not far away. My mom, James & Rhonda stayed with the Jeter's in Hagerstown and both sides of the family met one night for dinner. This is the photo of that night and we had a really great time.

One of the most important things to us is family. We would not be where we are now if it were not for the years of love and support from our family. The greatest thing about our families is that they support our relationship and are happy for us. WE ARE VERY LUCKY AND WE LOVE THEM VERY MUCH !!

Some Very Funny Cartoons!

Queer Duck

What's New

Here you can see a few of the things we have been up to. I have not updated this in a bit since we have been busy. Greg went full time and I am still teaching at the college part time and consulting full time. My project will most likely end in 2004, so if you know of anything, hit me up!







Last time mom was in Town we went out to Terrilli's in Frisco. Greg, Rhonda, my mom, Nick and Mark all went. It was a lot of fun, especially since it was a cool place and we got it all non gratis (Thanks James). They have these little curtained booths to sit in and we had a few bottles. Let's just say that Greg was not the only one feeling a bit hungover the next day. Guess who else was?





For Robert's birthday Kimmy threw him a surprise costume party. The theme was 70 & 80 sitcoms. Kim suggested Greg and I go as Mr and Mrs. Roper from Three's Company. As you can see I am perhaps one of the ugliest women you will ever see, but then again, I think that was what they were going for in the show. The Birthday Boy changed outfits three times. He went from Ginger, to Leather Daddy to cutie. The cake was awesome. It was a picture of him from the last party.

See if you can guess the who the others are supposed to be by dropping me a note in the comment section







I DON'T REMEMBER SEEING THESE EPISODES!!




This is a random shot of Greg giving me the look of death. What I like about this is how 3D or place looks

Are we GHEEEEEEEEEEEETTO or what??

We also went to Six Flags with Nick and Misty. That was a lot of fun since we did all the big rides.

"How to Write the Great American Indian Novel"

by Sherman Alexie (Spokane/Coeur d'Alene)


All of the Indians must have tragic features: tragic noses, eyes, and arms.

Their hands and fingers must be tragic when they reach for tragic food.


The hero must be a half-breed, half white and half Indian, preferably

from a horse culture. He should often weep alone. That is mandatory.


If the hero is an Indian woman, she is beautiful. She must be slender

and in love with a white man, then he has to be so white


that we can see the blue veins running through his skin like rivers.

When the Indian woman steps out of her dress, the white man gasps


at the endless beauty of her brown skin. She should be compared to nature:

brown hills, mountains, fertile valleys, dewy grass, wind, and clear water.


If she is compared to murky water, however, then she must have a secret.

Indians always have secrets, which are carefully and slowly revealed.


Yet, Indian secrets can be disclosed suddenly, like a storm.

Indian men, of course, are storms. They should destroy the lives


of any white women who choose to love them. All white women love

Indian men. That is always the case. White women feign disgust


at the savage in blue jeans and a t-shirt, but secretly lust after him.

White women dream about half-breed Indian men from horse cultures.


Indian men are horses, smelling wild and gamey. When the Indian man

unbuttons his pants, the white woman should think of topsoil.


There must be one murder, one suicide, one attempted rape.

Alcohol should be consumed. Cars must be driven at high speeds.


Indians must see visions. White people can have the same visions

if they are in love with Indians. If a white person loves an Indian


then the white person is Indian by proximity. White people must carry

an Indian deep inside themselves. Those interior Indians are half-breed


and obviously from horse cultures. If the interior Indian is male

then he must be a warrior, especially if he is inside a white man.


If the interior Indian is female, then she must be a healer, especially

if she is inside a white woman. Sometimes there are complications.


An Indian man can be hidden inside a white woman. An Indian woman

can be hidden inside a white man. In those rare instances,


everybody is a half-breed struggling to learn about their horse culture.

There must be redemption, of course, and sins must be forgiven.


For this, we need children. A white child and an Indian child, gender

not important, should express deep affection in a child-like way.


We should all be reminded that we are children. We should learn

about geometry: circles and squares, parallel lines and intersections.


In the Great American Indian novel, when it is finally written,

all of the white people will be Indians and all of the Indians will be ghosts.

From Greg
Oy! It's so hot here in Texas. The pool is out of order, so we have to sit inside in the ac all the time now. We played hooky from work yesterday and had a fabulous time sleeping late and shopping all afternoon. Can't wait til Labor Day weekend, we're going to New York for 5 days! Get me out of this hot conservative hell already!

HOWDY!

I know I have not updated this thing in forever so I thought I would. The Texas summer is getting HOT and we are spending more time in the pool. The weekdays consist of the day to day drudgery of work and we spend our weekends relaxing. I am taking a water color class and Greg wants to learn how to make sushi. We see Bobby around when he is not spending the night at Kimmy's. My mom took us all out for steaks last weekend to. Other past events include:

The Price family visited us
We went to Oklahoma
Greg's Brother and his GF visited us
Two weeks ago we went to the horse races (and I LOST)
This weekend we are going to see Todd and his Family and maybe go sailing
Next weekend we are going to Calgary to visit my mom...

Not much news to report but then I wonder if this site ever gets any visits at all....

Peace !

Getting Hitched

On Saturday May 3rd, 2003 we had a birthday bash for Greg. He turned the big three-ohh and he has been making a stink about it for awhile. Much to Greg's chagrin, we had not uttered a word about what we were doing for hid b-day, just that it was a surprise. We had friends and family come over about 7pm for drinks. We had some drinks as Greg opened presents. His big present came when I asked him to be my man. He's so sweet he actually said yes!! :-) We have been together 2 years and I love him more each day. I basically read a speech I had written to him and gave him a ring. When I finished there was not a dry eye in the house. I was nervous and glad to get that done....pheww! Now we could party!! Then came a knock on the door. Greg had been hinting at getting a dancer for his b-day. He opened the door only to find and old man wearing a chaffeur hat. Lucky for him, it was the limo driver. We had an amazing time at dinner and then proceeded to get crazy. We want to tie the knot in central park maybe next spring and of course we hope our friends and family can be there! A special thanks to all the friends and family who have supported us and me all these years! And a very special I LOVE YOU to Greg who actually puts up with me. Definately one of the happiest days in my life!

Look who is in Texas

Well things have a interesting way of working out. A few months ago I posted a picture of Kimmy on this website trying to fix her up and low and behold, she has a man now. The interesting thing is that I introduced her to a really amazing friend of mine named Robert. Robert and I have been through numerous things together which I guess is one reason we are such good friends. We have a lot of history together. Several years in Japan and a couple of years in New York. Now he has moved to Texas which I never ever imagined would happen and things are heating up between him and Kimmy. And for those of you who know him, he still walks around in boxers and scratches his balls. Some things never change. Also, keep an eye out for some exciting news on our website!

Dear Easter Bunny

Ok, time to update this mofo cuz it has been a looooooong time. I dunno if anyone even reads this damn thing but if you do, gimme a shout..I see Todd said hi. Wassup T?

We are looking forward to seeing you guys this summer. You and Apollo and El. They sound like lowriders "T, Apollo and El"

Here are some updates. Bobby now lives with Greg and I. We are charging him very high rent in the hope of getting him back for that high rent in NYC :-) He and Kimmy have really gotten all hot and bothered....those two are spending lots of time together...hmmm, I wonder what they are doing???

Greg started his new job at Countywide Home Loans. He is still floating around but I think he likes it...Like I told my man...you gots to have a J-O-B if you wants to be wif ME. Mom is coming in town for Easter/ Passover/ Wicken Cannibal Fest. That will be fun. I am still teaching college classes at night and on the weekends. We have been spending the evenings on the patio. Lets see...thats about all from my end. I will try to get some more pics up soon.

Later people...and say hi for god sakes..

Updates

So I am not the best blogger...I guess I can deal with that. I just don't have enough interesting things going on to write about. So I will gossip...Kim and Bobby seem to be heating things up. I figure the guy will be in Dallas in a month and it appears that they are in love...and WHO was the one who called it? ME!!! I said wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy back when that they would be great together and so far I am right....I wonder what will happen?

Greggy had an interview on Monday. I think I was more stressed than he was. I have one on Wednesday too but I am just milking my project here and wondering if I will find work by June...fer Chrissakes...here it is only March...am I a worrier or what?

Read a bunch of other people's blogs and realized how lame mine is...oh well. Also submitted mine on the NYC Bloggers the cool thing is that it organizes blogs by train lines.

Need to take more pictures and put them up here..if any of my friends bitch about how long it takes to load the pages I will say F@!* off and get a high speed connection.

love ya, mean it