Two Dads are Better than None

click the title for a very interesting read on gay culture

e have HUGE news to tell everyone. We wanted to share some big news with our friends and family first. Click on the title to learn more.

This is from my sister's blog...rock on Rhonda!! You will LOL reading it...

Funny things heard

Some pretty funny things have come out of my daughter's mouth in the past 24 hours. She seems to be really into observing her brother's body parts lately. And since he manages to take off his diaper any chance he gets, she has plenty opportunities to make her own observations of his body.

So today after his nap, he came downstairs to where we were sitting together, and his diaper was off of course. He started to climb on her, and they were playing nicely until she turned to me and said "ewww Mommy, Brandt's penis stinks!"

So a couple minutes later, my phone rang, and I was on the phone for a few minutes. It was a customer placing an order, and the kids chose that exact moment to start wrestling. I am listening to the lady tell me exactly what she wants on her shirt, and Brooklynn yells at the top of her lungs "STOP PUTTING YOUR PENIS ON MY FACE!!!!".

Oh shit. Did she realy just say that? I know for sure that the poor lady on the phone heard her, and I was mortified!

I continued the conversation trying not to laugh at what was going on, and I managed to finish taking her order a couple of minutes later. This lady probably thought I am a lunatic, but I probably am now that I think about it.

Can't wait to see what comes out of her mouth tomorrow. Night night!

I am sending this offer to my friends and family interested in making an easy $25 for signing up and $10 for everyone they refer. And no this is not some scam that gets you a million bucks from Microsoft or pays some poor dying kid 10 cents for every forward, this is legit. C'mon..would I forward something like that?? I did my homework on this offer, and this one is for real.

Steve Case from AOL started this to compete with Paypal, the only difference is that Money Revolution Exchange is actually a bank and therefore regulated and insured by the FDIC. It is another way to send and receive money electronically for free and I figure Paypal needs the competition since they have been getting pushy on their commissions. You can read more about it here: http://www.usatoday.com/tech/techinvestor/corporatenews/2007-11-06-ted-leonis-steve-case_N.htm

Click the link below to sign up under me to get $25. After you have signed up you can refer people and everyone who signs up under you means $10 you get. It is an easy and LEGITIMATE way to get some cash by passing this on to people you know.



By the way, just like a bank, you will be required to use your social to sign up. They are FDIC Insured, so that is the reason for the SSN.

Free (for now):
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Happy Friday and enjoy the extra $25!

Brent

This is how advertisers see me, LOL....does anyone else find the phrase "Get Laid Today" weird?

Human beings only have two ways to deal with one another: reason and force. If you want me to do something for you, you have a choice of either convincing me via argument, or force me to do your bidding under threat of force. Every human interaction falls into one of those two categories, without exception. Reason or force, that's it.
In a truly moral and civilized society, people exclusively interact through persuasion. Force has no place as a valid method of social interaction and the only thing that removes force from the menu is the personal firearm, as paradoxical as it may sound to some.

When I carry a gun, you cannot deal with me by force. You have to use reason and try to persuade me, because I have a way to negate your threat or employment of force. The gun is the only personal weapon that puts a 100-pound woman on equal footing with a 220-pound mugger, a 75-year old retiree on equal footing with a 19-year old gang banger, and a single gay g uy on equal footing with a carload of drunken guys with baseball bats. The gun removes the disparity in physical strength, size, or numbers between a potential attacker and a defender.

There are plenty of people who consider the gun as the source of bad force equations. These are the people who think that we'd be more civilized if all Guns were removed from society, because a firearm makes it easier for a [armed] mugger to do his job. That, of course, is only true if the muggers potential victims are mostly disarmed either by choice or by legislative fiat--it has no validity when most of a mugger's potential marks are armed.

When I carry a gun, I don't do so because I am looking for a fight, but because I'm looking to be left alone. The gun at my side means that I cannot be forced, only persuaded. I don't c arry it because I'm afraid, but because it enables me to be unafraid. It doesn't limit the actions of those who would interact with me through reason, only the actions of those who would do so by force. It removes force from the equation...and that's why carrying a gun is a civilized act.

Credited to: Maj. L. Caudill USMC (Ret) Hoo-Rah!

The most time and cost efficient way of gaining a white person’s trust and friendship is to talk to them about their time in high school.

Virtually every white person you meet was a nerd in a high school-it it is how they were able to get into a good arts program and law school. As such, their memories of high school are painful, but not tragic since they were able to eventually find success in the real world. Exploiting this information is your one way to ticket into the heart of a white person.

Your first priority must be to steer the conversation to the topic of high school, which is not very difficult. If you are talking about music, mention the music you think they would have liked in high school and how you were taunted for liking those bands. If you cannot properly gauge the type of music a white person liked in high school, you should always say that you were really into The Cure. All white people know that liking The Cure in high school is an invitation to be tortured by the cool kids. This will bring about instant sympathy and respect.

It is also acceptable to discuss how you were in love with a cool kid who never loved you back. For added effect, you can mention how said cool kid is now doing very poorly and that you are excited for the upcoming reunion.

I find this funny even though I am technically not 100% white.. read on

However, it is important to be aware of the fact that regions outside of San Francisco feature many people who are not white, gay or Asian. They are greatly appreciated during the census, but white people are generally very happy that they stay in places like Oakland and Richmond. This enables white people to feel good about living near people of diverse backgrounds without having to directly deal with troublesome issues like income gaps or schooling.

Still, the presence of other minorities are welcomed by white people for so many more reasons than just statistics! Much in the way that white people in Brooklyn feel a strong and unfounded connection with The Notorious BIG, white people in San Francisco feel the need to identify with rappers from the East Bay. Interestingly enough, the further they venture from San Francisco, the stronger their need to represent their region.

“Oh man, I went to the Too Short show last night. So hyphy man, so hyphy. You should come by some time and we’ll ghost ride the Prius.”

Stuff Mentioned

1. Nonprofit organizations
2. Arts Degrees
3. Manhattan
4. Public Radio
5. Knowing what’s best for poor people
6. Indie Music
7. Film Festivals
8. Hating Corporations

If white people could draft friends the way that the NFL drafts prospects it would go like this: black friends, gay friends, and then all other minorities would be drafted based on need and rarity to the region.

When choosing gay friends, white people like to base their decision on their own needs and requirements. Younger white people tend to prefer young, social gay people-this is their all important ticket into nightclubs and parties.

When a straight person goes to a gay night club, they are reminded of how progressive and tolerant they are. If they are hit on by a member of the same sex, it provides them with a valuable story that they can use to prove to their other friends that they are more progressive and tolerant. “This guy/girl hit on me, I said I was ’straight but not narrow,’ and it was totally chill. Oh, you went to an Irish bar this weekend? That’s cool, I guess. “


Stuff Mentioned:

1. Sushi
2. Apple Products
3. Whole Foods
4. Microbreweries (implied)
5. Living by the Water

You laugh because it is TRUE??!!..

“Each picture in Armed America could be a pro-gun advertisement - or an anti-gun poster. That’s what makes the book so riveting.”

very cool

http://informationarchitects.jp/web-trend-map-2008-beta/

This is funny too

http://www.cracked.com/article_15683_10-creepiest-craigslist-casual-encounters.html

One of the more interesting experiments on the web these days is the whole confessional aspect of it. People can anonymously post whatever they want to get off their chest and the whole world can see it. While there is certainly a dark side to this, reading these confessions is rather interesting and evokes sympathy, sadness, disgust and a laugh or two. Here is a collection of confessional links you may find hard to stop reading.

http://postsecret.blogspot.com/

http://www.confessionpost.com/

http://beta.grouphug.us/

http://www.lovehappens.com/confessions.html

http://www.truebrideconfessions.com/

http://www.truedadconfessions.com/

This is from my sister and is SOOO wrong. My apologies to all camel-toe gals!

My life is an open book, so for the betterment of all "metro-sexual" kind everywhere, here are some tips of performing a chemical peel for guys everywhere that want to look better.

Here is how guys can perform a simple chemical peel. It helps even out skin color and has long been used to freshen up your skin. I AM NOT A DOCTOR so you use this at your own risk. I am merely posting the results of my own experiment.

YOU MUST PLAN FOR 5-7 DAYS OF NOT REALLY GOING OUT IN PUBLIC, AT LEAST NOT THE FIRST 4-5 DAYS OR SO.

Being curious how the results would be, I purchased a home kit on ebay that came with instructions and 100% strength acid. The two big kinds are Glycol and TCA. You need to dilute them to at least 30%. I did 50% and it burned like hell. I could only last with it on my face for a minute and a half. You also have to watch out because rinsing it off over the sink may cause some to get in your eye. If that happens, start flushing it out and get help. This is not child's play. Remember, you are putting acid on your face and it should "frost" after applying it. In hind site, do a weaker solution instead of what I did. Trust me. Apply it carefully using a q-tip or cotton pad. I preferred to wipe it on with a pad, but it quickly started burning.
After you have neutralized the acid, wash you face with a gentle cleanser. Do it gently. You have just burned off a few layers of skin. Apply the ointment, aloe, vaseline, whatever you have that will not irritate the skin and will add moisture and protect the skin. You may want to fan your face since it will burn and hurt somewhat. Ice packs wrapped in towels are ok too.

The next 24 hours will feel like you have a really bad sunburn. Keep it moist and in a protective healing state. By the next couple of days your face will scab into dark brown skin patches. This is normal. For days it will feel like you have a very tight mud mask on your face.
Give your face a few days to heal and you can and wait for it to begin cracking after it has crusted over. Sounds gross I know, but soon you will have pieces of your skin falling off.
I let mine dry out some by putting a warn cloth on my face. Moisturize and use Advil if it gives you comfort. You should let it do its own thing and TRY HARD not to pick it off. That exposes unhealed skin and can leave scars. Do not even think of going out without SPF 30 on and a ball cap. You face does NOT need sun now, so block it well.

As your skin peels/falls off you will see smooth red skin below it.
Don't rush it and let your face flake off slowly and you will have brighter more even skin beneath it. Remember that you should NOT do this if you have important places to be at least 5 days after applying it I think. You will scare people.

I have included some picture of what I looked like during the process starting at day 1 through day 6 or 7. At the risk of embarrassing myself for the advancement of metros everywhere you can see them here, so don't make fun!

Let me know if you have any questions!

This guys is dead on correct with his advice. I have had more than 15 jobs and these bits of wisdom truly reveal the "art" of the job search.

>You know you wanna see..pretty funny really >

Here is a story that will be passed down for generations in my family..As I try to type this up I will have to stop from laughing so hard..

A couple of years ago my mom and Dawson came from Canada to Dallas for the weekend. Through a friend of hers who had a private residence at the very swanky Hotel Zaza, she was able to secure a very nice private apartment next to it with a view that overlooked the Dallas skyline.

They were staying there for the weekend and invited the family over for some wine and cheese so we could act like big shot high rollers. When I asked my mom about the set up, she mentioned that another friend of this friend also had a key to this place, but she was *likely* not stopping by. I thought it would be funny if *she* did.

Being the sneaky son I am, we had some friends coming over that my mom knew, but one friend, Val, who she had never met. You see, my mom had no idea what this woman looked like who supposedly had rights to the place too.

So my mom was having wine and feeling oh so cool in the Hotel ZaZa when I executed my plan. I got Dawson in on it since he also knew my mom was a bit afraid of this stranger showing up, who had a key and potentially more rights to the apartment than she did.

Before all my friends came up to check the swanky digs, I gave Val the key and told her to come in the apartment a few minutes later and just unlock it like she owned the place.

This is where it gets good... so friends come in and are ohhing and ahhing at the nice place and the view of the skyline when Val walks in like she owns the place. My mom has a rather shocked look on her face as this woman she has never met comes walking in as she is in the midst of entertaining as though it were HER place. My mom smiles politely and says some name, and then Val says that she was supposed to have the place this weekend. So Dawson chimes in about packing and moving to a Holiday Inn when I start to get "mad". "Oh great mom, you have no place to stay tonight. We have to leave." And bless my mom's heart, the whole time she just smiled at Val and when I could not stand it anymore we yelled out "April Foools!" and told her Val was in on the joke.

The entire place erupted in laughter and I think a few of us laughed so hard that we cried. It was truly one of the funniest sickest jokes I ever played on my mom. The look on her face was priceless and we still talk about it to this day!